Random Curiosity

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When you talk to that person everyday that it becomes a natural part of your daily routine. Then suddenly one day, it just stops. No reason. No explanation. They stop putting in the effort to talk to you and you don’t try either because you have no clue why and you don’t want to come off as annoying/clingy. You constantly question yourself why and what you did wrong. You think about it so much that it bothers you because it feels like a part of you is missing. Your day feels incomplete when you have to suddenly adapt to a new lifestyle without them. Then you see them doing perfectly fine without you. What’s worse is how they made it look so easy. Like you meant nothing to them. 

(Source: Facebook)

G, it’s for you

Twenty-Fourth

By Angel Oclinaria

 

I should not expect that everything will run smoothly. It will always be a long, tough ride. For you to achieve or get something that you badly want, you have to work hard for it. It is the willingness that will drive you to your goals. And the fact that people never get contented, they would always strive harder. I hope that the feeling of wanting more and wanting to win someone’s heart is always the same. Like a battle, you have to fight for it and you have to win every fight not because of the name but because of the love you have for your allies and from the country or home you are fighting for.

 

The feeling. It has been quite some time ever since I felt down and depressed. And it was hard. Yes, I know you are there for me. But I couldn’t feel you being really there for me. You wouldn’t text if I would not reply; you wouldn’t update me if I won’t ask. You don’t even call me even though I haven’t been texting for almost a day. SO what is this being there for me thing? I don’t get it. I understand if you are busy, I understand if you could not visit or be with me but a simple “hello, how’s your day? I’ve been really busy but I love you, always” will do. But you don’t even make me feel that you still care. Another thing, I really appreciate that you visit me, but you make me feel that you do that just for the sake of doing it. And it hurts…

 

The rant. If it wasn’t for you, I wouldn’t hold on to something that would hurt because I’m a weak person. I could easily give up. But you’ve made me who I am now, and even though there are times that you hurt me I still care. I may have hurt you for so many times, for saying that I want to leave you but I am grateful that you still hold onto something real. There is always a reason why I am doing those and for sure, that is because I am hurt. If you’re sensitive enough to know what I mean, everything will be fine but you are not. No offense, but you are kind of insensitive. Don’t let me enumerate all of the things that you kept on doing to me. What’s the point? You would never listen. “Sorry” is overrated, okay. I am sick and tired of you saying this. All I wanted to see, is you, taking an action to what you think is wrong. We must have a give and take process here. It’s not always about me. You should talk, too.

 

Opinion. I don’t hate you, because I have always loved you. What’s happening to us? I wanted the old you. But if you’ll always be like that maybe it’s better if I, too, should just let go. All the pain is worth it but I couldn’t take seeing myself being hurt so much by another man who doesn’t even care at all. I just want a little effort from you…is it too much to ask? Or is it just me? Everyday I ask Him “why” and I end up crying myself to sleep. These problems kept on coming and I couldn’t control them.

 

Even though you always hurt me, I know at the end of the day, I’ll always be there for you. And no matter what happens, I’d still care and I would still worry if you don’t talk to me. I know this is completely ridiculous and nonsense but I just have to say/write this. Because I couldn’t keep it to myself anymore and crying is not an option. So I guess if you have your own business, I might as well mind mine, from now on…if that’s what you really want, then I’ll just go with the flow then.

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